If you ask me what my strength is I’d say my flexibly. Not the stretchy, bendy type of flexibility. But the kind where you go with the flow. I can adapt with a new situation and go with the flow. I don’t always love change but I will definitely handle it in stride.
If you ask me what my weakness is, I’d say it’s also my flexibility. I can too easily go with the flow No more clean dishes? I guess we eat at restaurants from now on. Dirty clothes piled up on the floor? I guess I wear a Snuggie from this day forward. I can adapt to anything.
As much as I like to think that I’m flexible, that flexibility was recently tested. I’ve been growing my hair out for a while. It wasn’t really a conscious decision. I just had it in my head that if I went with a shorter haircut I could never change my mind and go back to a longer style. Weird, right?!
I’ve also been seeing the same hairstylist for a few years. And while I think he’s great at his job, he wasn’t working for me. He’d show up late for our appointments. It was like he’d run errands right before my appointment then return to work late.
I always had to wait for him. The last time he was one hour late! One hour!! That is a long time to have to wait, no matter how good of a hairstylist they are. On top of it, he was supposed to give me a Ouidad cut and color my hair, keeping some of the natural highlights. He gave me a regular cut and all over color. He was pretty poor at doing his job. I can see that now.
Since I consider myself a flexible person I went with it. I just kept putting up with it. Sure he doesn’t listen to me and he’s always late, but he’s good at cutting hair. Why upset the apple cart?!
But I lost any motivation to go back and see him. I’ve needed a haircut for a while. But I didn’t have the energy to go see him again. And finding a new stylist can be so much work. So I did nothing. I just stayed in this state of limbo between needing my haircut but not wanting to try someone new.
A friend told me about a Deva Curl cut. Like Ouidad, Deva Curl is a specialized cut for curly hair. I started researching it and decided I’d give it a try. I found a stylist nearby. Still I hesitated. I thought ‘I have a perfectly good stylist so why try something new?’
I finally bit the bullet and booked an appointment. I loved the fact that I could book my appointment online without having to call and negotiate which days and times work best for me.
Up to this point I was holding onto my long hair. I was like the biblical story of Samson except that my long hair didn’t give me any super power strength. OK so I was nothing like Samson.
Like I said before, I was living by this rule that if I cut my hair shorter, I could never go longer again. That was it for me. It’d have to be short hair from this point forward.
First, this is a weird rule. I have no idea where it came from. Maybe because my mom has had short hair since as long as I can remember. Still, my aunt had long hair her whole life. So honestly I have no idea where I came up with this rule. Worse yet, this rule was clouding my judgment.
Second, even if I wanted to keep my hair super short I could always add length with extensions or a wig. That’s what they were invented for, to change the look and length of your hair.
I hate when I live in a black and white world. Either I have long hair or I have short hair. I always pride myself on living in the gray area between black and white. But when it came to my current hair style, I was definitely living in a black and white world. Clearly, I can get hung up on weird rules. And I hung onto them for too long.
The Deva Cut The Deva Curl cut it awesome. It’s done on dry hair. Cristina did a great job.
We started by talking about my curls. Ever since I can remember, the right side of my hair has curled more than the left side. Every school picture can confirm this. This information helped Cristina give me a cut that was more evenly shaped.
Cristina had to cut a good chunk of my hair because of how it was layered by the previous stylist. I totally trusted her, even as I saw big chunks of hair falling to the floor.
The new cut curled up a lot so it made my hair look shorter than it was. Usually this would freak me out. But I love the cut so much. It feels so light. Plus it got rid of a lot of the natural red highlights that I’m not a fan of but make their way into my hair because of the summer sun.
I have seen the Houzz commercial so much recently and I’ve loved Kristen Bell and Jenna Fischer’s shoulder length bob haircuts. But I thought I didn’t want to part with my hair. Turns out I was fine parting with it as long as I had a great hairstyle. Oh, and a hairstylist that listened.
I love my shorter hair. It really rocks my curls. I”m glad I was able to overlook this dumb rule.
This rule was self imposed. I made it up based on who knows what. Because I put it on myself only I could remove it.
Sometimes we limit ourselves by adhering to weird rules. They may be forced on us by our upbringing or ingrained in us by something we heard or read. Sometimes we can never track down where these rules came from. But they have a way of keeping us from trying something new.
These rules can keep us playing it safe rather than trying something cool. They can keep us stuck in our comfort zone rather than encourage us to venture outside of where we’re comfortable.
Rules are good for providing boundaries and structure. But they can be bad for our sense of adventure. I changed my hairstylist. I changed my haircut. I even changed my hair color. And I couldn’t be happier.
What weird rules do you cling to? What weird rules are holding you back?